Tuesday, June 18, 2013


What is marriage to you? Is it a process of life? Why do you set it as a process of life? Is it due to the fact that in Singapore, if you aren't married, you can't bid for your own apartment? If that's the case, are you marrying for the sake of a property?

Maybe you might say that it's a lifelong commitment & with marriage, it binds your partner to you. But if two parties know their own relationships & are committed to each other for the long haul, do you really need a piece of legal paper to 'bind' you? Besides, with the increasing divorce rates, it ain't that binding after all. I do have comments from people, usually females, saying that once they are married, their partner wouldn't 'run away' or go astray. Really? How do you explain affairs & those cheating websites? If someone is really going astray, it doesn't matter if he/she is in a marriage or not. 

People judge. If you aren't married by a certain age, the society sees you as in a different light. A negative one at that. Your family will change from asking you about your future plans & start whispering both in front & behind your back. But the question here is, are you going to let yourself be pulled along by others? Do they know what's truly best for you? Better than yourself? Think again. 

I know I sound really cynical here and that I'm anti-marriage but really, no. I love weddings. I get all sappy at movie weddings and I used to think of the different kinds of wedding I could have. Beach, garden, Disney, etc. I was just like any other girl who dreamed of her Prince Charming who will one day sweep her off her feet. However, life opened my eyes along with reality. There's no one sweeping me off my floor except my dad whenever my room is dusty. 

Despite reality's harsh lessons, I still dream of getting a proposal I'll never forget (positively I hope) & my dream wedding. What's my dream wedding? Just a ceremony with my man. To see if there is any change in his eyes when he sees me when I'm the most beautiful, that I'll supposedly ever be, in my life. Along with an unique wedding ceremony. But I guess I won't really mind if I don't get my marriage. Cos to me, if my man is going to run, he will run. Even if he is legally bound to me. My marriage is just for my man to fulfill my childhood fantasies (vice-versa) & for him to be my Prince Charming. And most importantly, to enter a mutual commitment to each other. 

Of course marriage has its 'perks' & necessities. Besides getting the right to bid for an apartment & smirking at nosy relatives, it paves the way to have a family easier & cause no confusion for your kids, if any. Kids.. That's a topic for another day.

I guess, in the end, after 6 paragraphs, all I wanted to say is, know why you're getting married. Or why you're putting marriage as a step in your life. Don't do it for the wrong reasons. I know people will probably think I do not have enough personal experiences to speak of such stuff but I think I've seen a fair bit around me. Enough for questions to form in my head. To the readers of this article, I wish you a future you desire. 

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